Am I or not?

Anne Marie is going to keep me on my toes. So here is my recent life. This post is a little more private in nature, but here it goes. A while back, my hubby and I made sure that more children were impossible. Now there should only be a 1 in 5000 chance of my getting pregnant. The reason for this is that I get post-partum depression that never goes away. My youngest is almost three and I still take meds in order to control it daily. Well, my period is late! I took a test and it's negative, but I am totally having pregnancy symptoms. It really should be impossible, but it's driving me crazy not knowing what is wrong with me. If it's not pregnancy, what is it? I've never been this late unless I was pregnant. The latest I've ever been is a week. It's now been 48 days since my last period. That's 20 days late! What is up??? So, i'm freaking out. I have a doctor appointment next Thursday for other reasons and if there is nothing by then I'll talk to the doctor, but I doubt he'll give me any reasonable explanation. He's just like that. He'll make my fears seem silly and I won't actually get any answers. I'm just really frustrated. I'm trying to leave the situation in God's hands, but it sure is hard.

On another note, I am preaching this Sunday again. Maybe I'll learn something really great as I study. Well, I know I will, but maybe it will help me to leave things in God's hands. I think I'll be preaching on being called again, but from Luke 10 where Jesus sends out the 70 (or 72).

Well, at least I feel better having written all this down. Now that the world knows my personal struggles against pregnancy. :)

UPDATE: It finally started! Hallelujah! What a relief!